


A Stupid Way to Die

by kittyface27



Category: One Piece
Genre: Angst, Anime, Death, Drama, Insanity, Manga, One Piece - Freeform, Poison, Straw Hat Pirates, Tragedy, luffy gets sick, sick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-03-23
Packaged: 2019-04-04 07:39:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14015472
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kittyface27/pseuds/kittyface27
Summary: When Luffy eats something he's not supposed to, he falls terribly ill. Slowly losing his mind, can he keep going as the strong pirate captain and take care of his friends? Or will he succumb to his illness and leave his crew behind? Can Chopper do anything to help him? Can he deal with the fact he can't? Risk of major character death





	1. Part 1

Part 1 

Luffy was enjoying himself on the winter island the crew was docked at in the middle of the New World. He wasn’t very cold, but Nami and Chopper forced him to at least put on a jacket, which he promptly destroyed on accident almost immediately. Zoro was the one forced to chaperone the captain while the other Straw Hats picked up their supplies, or in the ladies’ case, clothes. 

After a couple hours of Luffy having fun and Zoro being bored and irritated that Luffy kept randomly throwing snowballs at him, no matter how many times Zoro threatened to injure him, Luffy predictably got hungry. They were a ways away from the ship, out in the middle of nowhere, so Luffy said he couldn’t wait and went foraging through the bushes and trees, coming across several colorful mushrooms. Zoro followed behind the idiot boy and saw him stuff the unknown mushrooms in his mouth.

“You did not just eat a random mushroom,” Zoro said irritably, already knowing the answer of course. Luffy swallowed and smiled, telling him it tasted great, followed by an angry tongue lashing by the swordsman, who insisted they get back to the ship. Luffy was still very hungry and willing to go back to the ship immediately, so off they went. 

The two were lucky they could still follow their footprints easily since it had not been snowing for a few hours. When they finally got back to the Sunny, the log pose had set fairly quickly so they left the island and followed the direction of one of the log pose needles. Luffy would miss the snow. Who knew when the next time they came to a winter island would be?

Luffy was happy. It had been a great day even though Zoro didn’t really pay attention to him the whole time. He didn’t see why he always needed to be baby sat. It’s not like the mushroom had done anything bad. That happened almost four hours ago and he was fine. Zoro had started to worry about the mushroom for some reason. Something was wrong. Maybe it was his weird bond with Luffy that he could tell something was off with his captain before he did himself. He felt irritation that he hadn’t noticed Luffy being an idiot and eating something that he didn’t even know was edible. Luffy’s motto was “everything is edible until discovered otherwise”. Zoro felt like telling Chopper, but he knew the young reindeer would freak. Luffy didn’t like his crew worrying about him.

Sanji had wanted to make fish that night for dinner, so Usopp, Chopper and Luffy were fishing, not catching much. Luffy was laughing at Usopp’s jokes, even though they weren’t very funny, before he suddenly felt sick.He made a small moan of discomfort before he blacked out and fell off the railing into the sea. It was a loud splash and then it became eerily quiet.

Both Usopp and Chopper sat there for a few seconds before they started screaming that Luffy had fallen into the water, as Zoro was already running to the edge of the ship. 

This time he reached Luffy fairly quickly since the waves were calm and the water was beautifully clearer than usual, but something was weird this time. Luffy looked like he was thrashing in the water, which was new. Usually his whole body locks up and he can’t move when he’s in the water. He grabbed the thrashing and sinking Luffy and made towards the surface as fast as he could. Luffy gasped for air when they reached the surface, but he was shaking like he was having a seizure, making it harder for Zoro to swim back to the boat and rope ladder that was thrown overboard against the side of the ship. Zoro hated that he was usually right when it came to his captains body and mind. Robin bloomed a ladder of arms and pulled the straw hat captain up onto the deck after running to the side when he heard two splashes and a panicking reindeer and sniper. Luffy was flopping around in her arms’ grasps, making it difficult to pull him up without dropping him back into the ocean.

Robin became even more concerned as Luffy continued to seize and flop around a bit after he had been set on the deck, his eyes rolled back in his head. Usopp and Chopper ran over to him, Chopper immediately going into doctor mode. Zoro ran over after climbing over the railing and onto the deck, immediately bombarded by Chopper with questions. Chopper was taking Luffy’s pulse as he almost interrogated the swordsman. 

As Zoro informed Chopper of Luffy eating an unknown mushroom, angry that he had let it happen in the first place, Luffy stopped shaking. His skin was extremely pale, almost translucent and his veins began to be seen. It was eerily fast, his deteriorating body. Chopper had never seen a patient get so bad so fast. Luffy’s condition was looking worse instantaneously. He had been fine up until a few moments ago, and now he looked sicker than he anyone he’d ever treated. Luffy then groaned in pain as he opened his eyes, which were bloodshot and hazy. 

“How do you feel, Luffy?” Chopper asked quickly as Robin hurriedly went into the infirmary to get the book Chopper had asked her to bring out. 

“Hurts and di- dizzy,” he mumbled out. By now, the other crew members had come over, and out of the others, Brook was sure of what had happened to Luffy. He was poisoned. He could just tell. Nami was shaking in fear as she saw Luffy in such a terrible state. He looked… wrong. Weak and sick, something Luffy had never and should never look like. Weak and confused and sick. Very sick.

Robin ran out of the infirmary with the book and quickly handed it to Chopper. It was an encyclopedia of fungus and mushrooms. 

“Zoro, which mushroom was it that Luffy ate?” he asked quickly as Luffy began to struggle with his breathing. He gave Zoro the book as he quickly flipped through the pages. There sure were a lot of different mushrooms. He began to worry as he got closer to the end of the book and hadn’t seen the specific mushrooms in any of the non-toxic sections. Finally he found what looked like the one Luffy ate in the… very toxic section. Shit. 

“Uh… This one! The red and white one but instead of circles the markings were more squarish.” Chopper gasped and recognized the mushroom. It was in the same family as the Amiudake, the mushroom he had accidentally fed to his father and killed him. He had done extensive research with the help of Doctrine on how to treat what mushrooms. This was one that he had not learned to treat. Because it couldn’t be treated and certainly not cured, not without a miracle, the kind no human could bestow. If there was a god somewhere, it’d be up to them to save Luffy. 

“Oh no,” the reindeer doctor whispered. He couldn’t tell the crew there was a one percent (more like half a percent) chance he could live. He knew it was wrong to give false hope, that had been beaten into his mind by both doctors he studied under. But he couldn’t tell his family that Luffy was almost certainly going to die.

“What? What is it?” Nami asked nervously.

“It’s a poisonous mushroom. It’s almost completely fatal. A five percent chance of surviving,” he lied. “Luffy, can you hear me?” he asked calmly, trying his best not to scare the sick boy and burst into tears. Luffy didn’t seem to be coherent, and started mumbling about Ace and someone named Sabo. “Luffy?” Chopper repeated louder, this time getting Luffy’s attention.

“Huh? Where am I?” Luffy asked in a slur. His fingers were twitching and he had some drool pooling from the corner of his mouth. He coughed and wheezed but then relaxed, looking at the people around him, confusion apparent on his sickly face.

“On the Sunny, Luffy,” Sanji said, starting to sound concerned. He couldn't remember where he was? He was directly under the sails and facing towards Sunny’s head.

“Whaza Sunny?” he asked, still clearly confused. “Who’re you?” Luffy asked Sanji, who was shocked at the question. Luffy sluggishly closed his eyes like he was going to fall asleep, only to be rocked awake gently by Chopper. He could sleep in a moment, in a more comfortable place. Everyone looked shocked at Sanji and then stared fearfully to Chopper. 

Chopper gulped and said, “Luffy, I’m gonna move you to somewhere more comfortable. Then I can help you fall asleep and relax.”

“O- ok,” Luffy mumbled before going straight back to talking about his dead brother and whoever Sabo was. Chopper turned into heavy point and carried Luffy easily to the infirmary and laid him down on the hospital bed. With the help of Zoro and a still shocked Sanji, they dried him off, stripped him and then put him in a warm fluffy robe. They’d get him some bottoms in a while.

He gently spoke to Luffy and informed him that he’d need to take some pills if he didn’t want an injection. It took a few minutes to get Luffy’s attention and repeat what he told the sick captain a bit louder. Luffy took the pills, spilling water all over his neck and face. Chopper got a towel and wiped the water off as Luffy fell into a deep sleep and then put an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. He would not underestimate this poison, and he needed to feel he had done all he could, even if Luffy’s passing was set in stone.

Chopper didn’t feel comfortable leaving Luffy by himself when he was so ill, so he called for the rest of the crew to come in and speak quietly. 

“How is he? What’s gonna happen to him? Is he ok?” Usopp asked, obviously panicking. Luffy looked worse than any injury ha’d ever gotten. He even looked worse than when he was paralyzed and bleeding after he beat Lucci.

“I said before… he has a... very low chance of surviving. The mushroom was in the same family as Amiudake, which kills the victim within the hour. Thankfully, he has a longer time to try and survive, around three or four days, but it’s also unlucky. When he’s not asleep, he’s going to be disoriented and hallucinating while in pain, though I don’t know for sure since he’s not a normal human. He may sustain some memory loss, but if he lives… it shouldn’t be permanent,” Chopper said sadly, but still maintaining his professional voice. “Nothing I say might happen. I’ve never treated someone with a Devil Fruit other than stitching Luffy up and giving him some pain medicine and left the rest up to him…”

“What other effects with there be?” Zoro questioned. He knew it had to be worse than Chopper was saying based on the way his voice shook. But he couldn’t see through Chopper’s expert lie. He didn’t know Luffy was in a worse situation than he could have ever been in.

“Well, the poison from this mushroom targets the blood system and brain. If his immune system fails fighting off the poison, he won’t recover from the poison at all… and will die. The hallucinations will become stronger and more often as time goes on. He’ll most likely have more seizures… It won’t be a good experience for Luffy.” He took a deep shuddering breath and continued, “I- I don’t want more than two people being in there. He didn’t recognize Sanji. He may panic if he’s stuck in a room with a large group of people he sees as strangers. Sanji, you should only go in when you bring him meals,” Chopper apologized when Sanji looked upset, telling him bringing food may help Luffy remember who the cook was. “There’s also a small chance he won’t be able to speak anymore…”

The crew couldn’t really comprehend this. Luffy? Not talk? He wouldn’t be Luffy if he couldn't talk and be annoying. But it felt better to be upset over that instead of the fact Luffy could die easily.

Robin spoke next. “Is it safe for him to be asleep?” She looked quite concerned, no longer calm, even less calm than Chopper was. Her lips were trembling. She looked more scared than she had when they had been separated by Kuma. And she was terrified then. But seeing Luffy like this is more horrible than not knowing what happened to her crew. At least then, she could hope and believe they were still alive and okay. Luffy barely looked alive right now.

“It’s fine. I can give him medication to help him with the pain. But this is Luffy, and I’ll say once again, he’s made of rubber so I’m not positive things will go how its supposed to. And there is no real treatment for the poison, but the brain failing is the main problem. If any of his other organs were to fail, it would be possible to save them… but not the brain… A lot of his chance of surviving is based on his will to live but- but that might not be enough.” He couldn’t tell them they should say their goodbyes. He couldn’t. 

Chopper’s diagnosis still hadn’t hit the rest of the crew. Luffy, dying? How stupid. They were convinced Luffy was basically immortal and invincible. He’d be fine and make it through this. He’d then joke about it inappropriately, like when he was frozen by Aokiji. 

Franky then asked something no one had thought of. “Wait, he’s supposed to be immune to poison, so why is this affecting him?” 

“We don’t know how he became immune to poison, so there’s no way to know why or how that works. It could be for only some types of poison, and poisonous mushrooms can be very bad. I’m going to stay in here for now. Does anyone want to stay in here with me?” Chopper questioned. Zoro was first to say he’d stay, and no one argued. Sanji informed Chopper sadly that he was going to start dinner and asked what he should make for Luffy. He couldn’t even look at him lying on that bed, having already forgotten who Sanji was.

“When he wakes up, make him broth and maybe some apple sauce later. Please bring some water in a bottle when you leave.” Chopper sighed, “I want him to be able to eat and drink, not need liquid nutrients and water hooked up to keep him fed and hydrated.”

“I’m sure he’s gonna love that. Either eating non-fulfilling food or not eating at all,” Usopp said somewhat dryly. The severity of the situation still hadn’t clicked with him. Nami glared at him. 

“This is no time for jokes!” she whispered harshly at him. Usopp blushed and apologized quietly, though he didn’t mean his words to sound like a joke. There was no point in arguing at the moment. Not while he could hear Luffy’s somewhat heavy breathing.

“He may not remember what his favorite type of food is if he’s going to have memory loss. If he forgot who Sanji was, it won’t be surprising for him to forget something like meat,” Robin mentioned.

The others left besides Zoro and Chopper. Zoro sat against the wall across from the bed Luffy was sleeping on. Zoro watched as Chopper hooked Luffy up to a machine to show his heart rate and tried making Luffy as comfortable as possible. He adjusted the bed and fluffed the pillows and rearranged Luffy’s limbs so he could be in the most relaxed position. Zoro was asked to get some underwear for Luffy and then they changed him, adding a couple layers of blankets over his still form to keep him warm. 

It was a little over an hour that Sanji brought Zoro and Chopper dinner, which was a simple sandwich for everyone with their favorite food on it. Luffy woke up before he should have thanks to the smell of the food in the room. Neither Chopper nor Zoro noticed him wake up until he started talking to Sabo about a tiger. Chopper became worried as Luffy moaned from being uncomfortable, so he adjusted the bed again so he was in a more sitting position.

Zoro put his food down and kneeled next to the bed as Chopped took Luffy’s temperature. He said, “102.4”, aloud and sighed. The fever would probably stay present. Chopper took off a layer of blankets and put a wet washcloth over his head while Luffy continued to talk to no one.

“Luffy, who’s Sabo?” Zoro asked clearly and a bit loud so Luffy could hear him. It seemed that was what made him realize there were other people in the room.

“Nii-chan,” he slurred. Zoro questioned that he had more than one brother. He had never told any of them about another brother. “He’s dead,” Luffy said surprisingly clearly and looked at his hand, hallucinating that it was covered with bubbles. “Bubbles?” he asked curiously, diverting Zoro’s question about Luffy’s second brother. Now was not the time. Luffy slowly wiped the bubbles he saw on the blanket, confusing Chopper and Zoro.

“I should put him back to sleep,” Chopper said, reaching for the pills before Luffy mumbled he was hungry. Zoro immediately left the room to get Sanji to make him some food while Chopper was conflicted about letting him stay awake for an extended period of time. It was clear he was starting to hallucinate more than before. He looked around the room like he’d never been there before. Chopper finally decided Luffy needed some food more than sleep at the moment.

Only a couple minutes later Sanji walked in and brought the bowl of broth near Luffy and sat down next to him to spoon feed him, for once not feeling awkward about helping one of the boys while they were sick. Luffy was very sick so Sanji wasn’t going to be his usual self concerning the same sex. 

Luffy had gotten a lot of the broth down so there was only a bit left. He reached up to try and take the bowl, spilling the hot liquid on his neck. He felt too weak to scream at the moment so he just moaned in pain, scrunched his eyes, and touched the burning liquid on his neck. 

“Shit,” Sanji said, trying to take a towel and wipe him off, but Luffy turned his head away from Sanji and tried to scootch away from him a bit, but mostly barely flopped, his head lolling around on its side. He seemed to go in and out of being able to speak. Right now, he couldn’t speak.

Chopper looked sadly at the scene before taking the towel himself and wiped it off before going across the room to get some burn cream he had made. The burn wasn’t too bad, but Chopper didn’t know if Luffy’s pain tolerance had been affected. Usually he could handle things like being stabbed. 

Sanji knew he fucked up here, even though it was mostly Luffy’s fault. He picked up the bowl and left, depressed and furious at the same time. He ran into Zoro outside of the room and took his anger out on him.

“This is all your fault!” Sanji shouted. “You were supposed to be watching him and this happens!”

Zoro grew furious. He knew it wasn’t all his fault, but it was his responsibility to keep Luffy out of trouble while he played in the snow, and looking away for just a moment had doomed the boy. Zoro actually punched Sanji in the face and told him to “shut the fuck up” and then stormed back into the infirmary, almost slamming the door behind him before he looked at Luffy and closed it quietly. 

 

Chopper had given Luffy his sedatives and medication to help with his pain. The sick teen was now sleeping again. Zoro noticed the bright red area on his neck. “Chopper what happened to him?” he asked, concerned.

“He spilled some soup on himself. I think he’s afraid of Sanji now,” Chopper said sadly. Zoro now knew why Sanji had been so angry, though he still was irritated he took out his anger on the first person he saw, which had been him. At least Zoro got a good stress relieving punch. He knew Sanji would be pissd for a while and Zoro was only not kicked at because of their mutual concern for the straw hat captain.

It was another three hours that Chopper and Zoro stayed in the room with Luffy. Chopper was sure that Luffy would stay asleep longer this time since he had given him a stronger sedative. This one would last for five hours. Luffy moaned in his sleep a little bit. The poison stung all over his body. The sedatives were good for him. Zoro eventually left by Chopper’s order to go take a nap or something, who was replaced by Robin. She sat next to him as Chopper took a short and much needed nap and read a book.

Luffy woke again a couple hours later, confused that Zoro and Chopper weren’t there. Well, he thought he’d woken up. He was even more confused that he was surrounded by stone walls in the dark, chained to a slab of stone. He was writhing in pain and began to cough up blood and scream, feeling his body being ripped apart from the inside. He was left alone for hours and hours, coughing up blood and screaming. 

He was shaken awake gently, screaming, by Robin. He looked around and saw he was no longer in a dark hole and was on a mattress, not a stone table.

“Luffy, it was all a nightmare. You’re safe,” she said. Though she knew he wasn’t safe in his own body, and didn’t look safe at all. He was still pale with his blue and red veins clearly visible through the skin. He stopped sobbing after a few minutes, and then became silent. “Do you want to talk about it?” Robin asked, though she thought he wouldn’t be able to string coherent words together to make sentences.

“Impel Down… Magellan… poison… ten years… Iva-chan,” he jumbled the words together. He looked at his wrists, which were free and not in chains. It was around midnight and mostly dark in the room. Chopper had went to use the bathroom, so he wasn’t in the dark room, except for a single lamp next to where Robin was sitting. She could hear a bunch of footsteps coming from a room near the infirmary, so she bloomed a mouth and ear in the men’s quarters, telling them Luffy had a nightmare and was fine. The footsteps stopped.

“You don’t need to talk about it anymore, Luffy,” she said kindly, though she was painfully curious about his nightmare. He suddenly began to cough violently. Between coughs, he moaned out “Iva-chan save me” over and over. To say Robin was confused was an understatement. Who was Iva-chan? How could this person help Luffy?

She was pulled out of her musings when Chopper came running in. “Is he ok?!” Luffy had stopped coughing and was now moaning and holding his throat, hurting from the screaming and burn. He had pulled the oxygen mask off after the started coughing, but Chopper put it back over his face. 

“He had a nightmare,” she said simply, planning to go into more after Luffy fell asleep. “Can he get anymore sedatives yet?”

“No, he has to wait another hour. Even if he’s going through it faster than normal, I don’t want to risk him overdosing.” Luffy didn’t react to their conversation about him as he looked around, seeing star-like glowing dots flowing through the air in the room. Chopper looked from Robin to Luffy as he tried reaching the bright dots swirling in the air above him. Chopper gently took his outstretched hand and pulled it down back to the bed, patting it soothingly. Luffy was still out of it as he continued to watch things swirl around in the air. 

“I’ll try reading to him,” Robin said and picked up her book, one she’d read many times and that Luffy had once shown interest in it, and held his hand gently. She began to read about the Rainbow Mist. Luffy listened to the story silently for the remaining hour. She couldn’t really tell if he was processing her words, but he stayed relaxed and quiet, so that was good. Chopper fell asleep to the story. He was so tired. He’d been awake for a very long time and the stress wasn’t helping. 

Robin felt bad when she had to wake him an hour after Luffy had woken up. Luffy turned his head to Robin as if confused she had stopped reading. He started to cough again, horrible throaty coughs that sounded painful and the seizures started again, but this time he was awake and looked absolutely miserable but still had hazy unfocused eyes. He knew he didn’t like what he was feeling, but he didn’t really know what it was or what could make it better, so he laid there limply and tried not to fight the motions. 

Chopper took Luffy’s hand again and apologized from the bottom of his heart that there was no treatment, but told Luffy he knew he could make it through this, though he couldn't. He needed to give Luffy hope. Luffy continued to seize as Chopper spoke. He had to wait for the seizures to stop to give Luffy his sedative. 

Finally, Luffy’s body became still and Chopper immediately made him take his medicine just in case the seizures came back and then put the oxygen mask back on. Luffy fell back asleep, but even in his sleep he looked miserable. 

“Chopper, please tell me the truth about his chances. I know you have been hiding the truth.”

Chopper sighed, but needed to come clean to someone, and Robin was a good choice in his mind. “He has half a percent chance to live. And even if he lives, he may come out permanently damaged. I’m trying to prepare myself for his death, but it just isn’t clicking. Luffy can’t die. But I know he will and I just can’t feel sad about it yet. Don’t tell anyone else yet.”

Robin stayed quiet while he spoke, shill holding Luffy’s pale and clammy hand as he slept deeply. She bit her lip to stop the tears. She wasn’t usually an emotional person, but Luffy was important to her. He saved her time and time again in every sense. It was also hard to comprehend him dying in such a… pathetic way.

She hugged Chopper as they watched him sleep and breathe heavily. He still had a miserable expression on his face.

 

So the first day passed and Luffy’s condition had gotten worse.


	2. Part 2

Part 2

The next morning, Luffy was brought a bowl of applesauce for breakfast from Robin when he woke up. As she fed him, she had a feeling that there was no way he’d be full by the applesauce, but Luffy surprised her by getting full before he even finished the bowl. He was given a bottle of water so he didn’t spill anything on himself again. Chopper had been sleeping from the time Luffy had fallen asleep to a half hour before the sick captain awoke and was now in the kitchen. Nami and Usopp walked in, having wanted to see him for what felt like a long time, trading places with Robin. 

Usopp was happy Luffy’s eyes lit up when he saw him, only to have his mood plummet when Luffy said hi to him as Ace. 

“Ace. I missed you,” he slurred and reached for his hand. Usopp looked at Nami with pain across his face, wondering what he should do. She moved her head towards Luffy, so Usopp took his hand. Nami didn’t take it personally that Luffy didn’t acknowledge her once he saw “Ace”. 

“How’s - cough - the old man?” Usopp and Nami had no idea who “old man” was supposed to be. Usopp asked who it was, causing Luffy to frown. Ace didn’t know who old man was? It was obvious.

“Whitebeard,” he said, his eyes starting to close but he forced them open again. Nami was surprised he mentioned Whitebeard. Did he meet him? But Whitebeard was dead… he died at the War of the Best.

“Why’d you - cough - sto- stop running?” Luffy asked Usopp, who was now thoroughly confused. Suddenly Luffy looked extremely confused and pulled his hand away from Usopp.

“Where’d Ace go?” he asked, looking around the room. Usopp looked at him heartbreakingly. Luffy continued to look around the room, moving his head slowly. He didn’t look like Luffy while he was like this. Luffy was strong. Now he was weaker than weak, and not just in physical strength. Everything about him from his eyes to his posture were weak.

“He had to go see Whitebeard,” Usopp lied softly, trying harder to make it more believable than any lie he’d ever told. 

“Oh ok,” Luffy said and leaned back against the pillow. He had started to ask where Chopper was when in the middle of the sentence he began to seize. Nami cried out in panic as Luffy’s body shook, rattling the whole bed. Usopp ran out of the door, almost tripping on his way out, to get Chopper, who was in the kitchen eating with Sanji at the counter while the others of the crew sat quietly against the wall, or in Zoro’s case, hunched over sitting at the table with his head in his hands, absolutely miserable. 

Surprisingly, Sanji hadn’t picked a fight with Zoro yet. It felt wrong for them to do their usual squabbles when Luffy was sleeping.

“Chopper, Luffy is shaking!” Usopp shouted in a panic. Chopper put his napkin down and looked at the table.

“There’s nothing I can do to help him,” he said miserably. “I’m supposed to cure every disease in the world and I can’t even help him with a stupid mushroom.”

Sanji spoke from the kitchen. “Did Doctrine say there was no cure?”

Chopper froze for a moment. “Well, yes,” he answered.

“Isn't she an amazing doctor? Better than you? If she said there was no cure, then there is no cure as of now. Maybe if we had gotten a sample of the mushroom, you could have, but we didn’t. So please stop beating yourself up. You’re doing the best you can right? You’re helping him with the pain. That’s more than enough right now,” Sanji finished, his words making Chopper feel a little less useless. 

“So, can you go help him right now?” Usopp demanded, a little frustrated and irritated that no one seemed to care. Chopper nodded and the two ran back to where Luffy was.

Luffy continued to seize as Nami held his hand. He was frowning in irritation more than pain and discomfort. After a few minutes, he finally stilled. “Sleep…” he slurred, his head lolling. He looked at Nami, scaring her because of how horrible he looked. His eyes had dark circles under them, his lips were chapped, his whole body was very pale and the veins seen through all of him. He looked like he was truly dying or even already dead.

“Bon-chan?” he asked Nami. Nothing he had been saying made any sense to her. Whitebeard, Ace not running from something, and now Bon Clay? 

Luffy laughed as he looked at Nami, like she’d said something funny. “Hah you got the minotaur. Why were you Zoro?” he laughed again, which turned into coughs. “You’re right... Hancock was... bath… beam...” Every word was more slurred and then he spontaneously, a bit weakly and quietly, started crying, concerning Nami deeply. It was then that Chopper and Usopp came in. Chopper saw Luffy crying and assumed the worst. That he was close to dying already.

“What happened?! Luffy, do you hurt somewhere?!” he asked in a panic. 

“Bon-chan died,” he said with a shaking voice through his tears and again started to seize. This time was worse because his eyes rolled back and drool started to fall out of his open mouth while tears continued to fall. The three watched Luffy shake in horror. How long was he going to be like this? It’s already day two out of four and Luffy was just getting worse. 

When he stopped, Chopper again immediately made him swallow the pills and drink the water, desperately trying to get it done before he started to seize again. This had become routine. Chopper told Usopp and Nami they could leave now since they were both shaking at what they’d just witnessed. 

Chopper had come to terms with Luffy’s death last night as he slept. He had a dream where Luffy was laughing and playing with him. Then he woke up to him like this. It was clear he wasn’t Luffy at the moment, and Chopper’s Luffy might be gone already. But he couldn’t say goodbye to Luffy, because that would tell Luffy he was going to die for sure. Chopper didn’t know how Luffy’d handle that.

“I’ll stay with him now. Go get some food,” the reindeer doctor said to them. They hurried out of the room and walked into the galley, still shaken.

Robin looked up, and noticing their expressions, put down her book and asked very seriously, “What happened?” as she sat against the wall next to Brook, who had been quiet through everything. It was bringing back terrible memories for him. Why did both of his captains have to be fatally poisoned? It was cruel irony.

“His hallucinations are getting worse,” Nami said sadly. “He thought Usopp was Ace and, for some reason, that I was Bon Clay. Then he brought up Whitebeard, Boa Hancock and told Usopp, or “Ace”, that he had stopped running. He also brought up a minotaur and that Bon Clay had been Zoro.” When Zoro looked at her like she was crazy, she added, “I’m not the one who said it!” 

Zoro had sat quietly when Usopp ran in wanting Chopper to help Luffy. It pained him to hear Chopper could do nothing to stop the seizures and that Zoro couldn’t do anything to help either. 

“He had a nightmare last night about Impel Down. He said Magellan, ten years, poison, and someone named Iva-chan. I think he’s hallucinating about the war. Whitebeard had been at the war, so it’s not a surprise he might have met him,” Robin concluded.

“But what about Impel Down and Magellan?” Usopp asked.

Franky spoke next. “Ceasar mentioned Magellan. He was a poison man. Is that how Luffy got his immunity to poison?! He went to Impel Down?!” Franky had had nightmares about that place and how Tom had been sent there for years.

“I still want to know why he said I was Bon Clay. I don’t even look like him and I definitely wasn’t with him after our separation,” Zoro said grumpily. 

“Iva-chan…” Sanji muttered to himself. He could only think of one person who was at the war with the name Iva. He spoke a bit louder, “Iva-chan could be Ivankov from the Revolutionary Army. He was locked in Impel Down until before the war.”

“I think it’s safe to say Luffy went to Impel Down. I still don’t know what he meant when he said ‘ten years’. It doesn’t sound good,” Robin finished.

“Well, I found out Luffy had a second brother,” Zoro said. When everyone looked confused, he added, “That’s who ‘Sabo’ was. Apparently he’s dead.”

“Poor Luffy-san. It’s like the sickness is bringing all his bad memories back,” Brook said for the first time. “But at least he has gotten to see his brothers again, even if they’re not really with him.”

“He’s not getting better. It’s like he’s getting worse. I think his seizures have gotten more violent. I want this to be over!” Usopp wailed. Nobody said anything since it was obvious they all agreed. The room was quiet. No one could bring themselves to say that he’ll be fine. It was looking like that wasn’t true. Robin frowned at the others and Usopp’s words felt like a slap to the face. If what Chopper said was true, it would only be over once Luffy passed.

“Luffy, you have to lay back down!” Chopper said loudly and slowly, trying to come across as calm in the infirmary next door. Luffy was stumbling around the room yelling for someone to give his hat back. He was very unsteady and Chopper was confused that he’d fall or hurt himself in some other way. He also didn’t want to restrain him in his heavy point is case he’d scare him. 

“Give it back, Crocodile!” he slurred lously, not able to shout at the moment, and then told Lucci to give it back, followed by Akainu, then Arlong, and a list of other defeated enemies. Chopper really hadn’t wanted to inject him, but he coudln’t figure out how to restrain him without leaving the room to get the others. He didn’t want to do that because Luffy might trip and fall and hurt himself while he wasn’t there. 

Chopper resorted to throwing something at the wall connecting the galley and the room the two were in, but the sound startled Luffy, who fell to his knees and hit the floor with a heavy thud and a loud exhale as the wind was knocked out of him. “Luffy!”

The others heard the loud thump and Zoro and Sanji ran out and into the infirmary to see Chopper pushing Luffy onto his back to see if he was ok. He seemed to have stopped seeing enemies taking his hat, but he was out of it and staring at floating specks in the air. The rest of the crew wanted in but remembered that Luffy might get overwhelmed with all of them in there, so they waited as Zoro and Sanji closed the door behind them, Sanji giving them a look of “I’ll tell you later”. The two looked back to see Luffy laying on his back with Chopper trying to wake him up enough to ask if he hurt anywhere. He was in a lucid state and couldn’t answer.

“Chopper what happened?” Zoro said quietly. He didn’t want to scare Luffy.

“He hallucinated that past bad guys were taking his hat and then fell down. Help me get him onto the bed,” Chopper commanded.

Zoro came forward and gently picked Luffy up and walked the few feet to the bed. He laid him down, trying to be as gentle as possible. Luffy started muttering about his hat again, but then looked to his side and saw the hallucination of Ace. Luffy seemed to stretch his arm like a normal human would, reaching for something in the air, before he looked at his hands and saw his hat there. 

To the other three, it looked like he was holding something invisible before he mutters a relieved “hat…” and then relaxed on the bed. Chopper sadly pulled the blankets over Luffy gave him some water. He still had over two hours before he could safely take sedatives again. He was going through them rather quickly, and that bothered Chopper because he didn’t know why. 

“I can’t put him to sleep for another two hours. I don’t know what to do… He’s not acting like a normal patient would, and I don’t know why…” Chopper said miserably. 

Zoro volunteered to have Usopp tell him stories for a while to calm him down before Luffy said he was hungry, making the words sound garbled. Luffy was staring off into space again, drool coming out of the side of his mouth. Zoro, Sanji and Chopper would have liked to think the drool was from hunger, but they knew that wasn’t the case.

Sanji left to get some warm applesauce for Luffy. As he walked out, he told Usopp to go into the room after Sanji left again. The crew could see through the doorway that Chopper was running his hoof through Luffy’s hair gently, which seemed to calm the sick captain more as he relaxed into his pillow.

It wasn’t long before Sanji came back with the apple sauce and, not wanting Luffy to freak if he still saw Sanji as a stranger, gave Zoro the bowl. Zoro had to gently turn Luffy’s head to the side and propped the bed up a bit so he could spoon feed him.

“I feel so horrible for not being able to treat him properly. I can’t tell if he’s in pain or not because he’s always so out of it. And I don’t want to risk making it worse by giving him improper medication.”

Zoro was silent for a moment as he fed Luffy. “It’s really bad, isn’t it Chopper?” Chopper nodded. Zoro left it at that. Part of him knew, when looking at Luffy now, that he was going to die, but he also didn’t want to have that confirmed, so he didn’t say anything else. 

After Luffy was finished, Chopper adjusted the bed so it was flat again and rearranged Luffy’s limbs to make him more comfortable. Zoro left to go get Usopp and tell him he had to make stories up for Luffy. Usopp was happy to, but also dreading it. He knew if he did this he’d help Luffy, but he’d also be seeing Luffy how he was now. He didn’t want to. Zoro seemed to sense this.

“Wouldn’t you like to help him? He’s messed up right now, but every little thing helps.” That was all Usopp had to hear before he walked into the infirmary. 

He hated what he was seeing. Luffy looked worse than he did just a couple hours ago! He was sweaty and his eyes were really hazy, more so that Usopp’s last visit. Usopp gulped and then began telling him about his time during their separation. Just like Luffy did when Robin was reading to him, he stayed still and quiet, not giving away that he was hearing Usopp’s words.

Usopp had run out of stories that were true about an hour into the two hour long wait and had to start making them up on the spot. He did well to distract Luffy. Well, look like he distracted him. Luffy didn’t really make any impression of paying attention or processing his words.

 

Chopper cried by himself in the infirmary as he watched over Luffy, who was now sleeping deeply. The heart monitor had been fine except during his seizures and he felt using the oxygen mask was a good call. He could do nothing to help Luffy but give him sedatives and if he needed them, some pain medication. He didn’t want to do that unless Luffy was truly in terrible pain. He didn’t know how that type of medication would mix with the poison. He didn’t want to risk it unless he had to.

 

Brook wanted to go see Luffy himself. He hadn’t visited, he and Franky the only ones who hadn’t gone to see him. Zoro had said it might scare Luffy that a walking skeleton and a giant robot looking man could come in. He also said since Sanji wasn’t recognized and scared him, if he didn’t remember who Brook was, he might panic and get frightened, which would do no good. 

Sanji did not like being reminded he was the only one so far who Luffy hadn’t known who he was. Why did Luffy forget him? You’d think he’d remember someone who cooks his meals and snacks every single day. Truth be told, it hurt that Luffy couldn’t recognize him. And then Luffy had spilled hot soup on himself and blamed Sanji for it! Typical Luffy, stupid and dense. 

The crew sat in silence for quite a while before they spoke of whether they should drop anchor or continue to follow the log Luffy had chosen. They had no one to captain them. For once, everyone was irritated Luffy hadn’t made a first mate. No one volunteered; Luffy was captain. But eventually, Robin made the call for them, that they’d continue to sail. Everyone agreed since Robin has proven herself just by taking care of herself on her own for twenty years. She had also proven her loyalty. 

 

Since Chopper knew there wasn’t anything he could do at the moment, he just took out and prepared the liquid sedatives to inject since it was getting difficult to have Luffy take the pills. He really hadn’t wanted to use injections because Luffy didn’t like needles, but drastic times call for drastic measures. 

It was a long five hours for everyone. Robin passed the time reading; Nami and Usopp played hangman halfheartedly; Sanji tried cooking a lot of liquid foods for Luffy other than broth and apple sauce, but wasn’t having much luck; Zoro was in the crow’s nest working out, continuously dropping the weights from distraction, something that never happens; Franky and Brook were trying to compose a song, but it wasn’t very good. But Chopper had the hardest time.

For five hours, he watched Luffy sadly, tears streaming down his face almost the entire time. Luffy was going to die. He would miss him terribly. Would he continue to sail with the rest? Would any of them continue? Luffy was the heart of the crew, and things would feel wrong without him annoying or protecting his friends. 

“Luffy… why did you have to eat that mushroom?” he whispered miserably. 

 

Luffy woke up after the pills had worn off. He became terrified when he realized he couldn’t move or feel his body. He couldn’t really tell if anyone was in the room by sight because he couldn’t turn his head to the side, but he used his haki as well as he could, which surprisingly hadn’t faded all the way. There was someone small in the room.

“Chopper?” he croaked. He sounded like he was thinking clearly for the moment.

“I’m here Luffy,” his voice came from Luffy’s side. “How are you feeling?”

“I… can’t feel my body… or move.” Chopper’s face contorted back into that miserable and self-loathing expression. He wasn’t surprised. Then Luffy made him feel worse by whispering simply, “I don’t want to die.” Chopper was silent. “Chopper, am I going to die?”

Chopper didn’t answer for a moment. “I - I don’t know Luffy,” Chopper lied. He couldn’t bring himself to tell him it was over! “You’re not getting any better. And there’s nothing I can do but let you sleep. Are you in pain?”

“Not right now. I can’t feel anything. Please tell me I won’t be paralyzed,” he almost begged.

“If you get better, you should not be paralyzed permanently...”

“I hope not…” Luffy’s eyes unfocused and he stared and smiled at the ceiling. “Oh Ace you’re back! Where’d you go? Usopp said you had to go see Whitebeard,” he said, sounding happy, as if he had just forgotten what he and Chopper were talking about while he talked to the air above him. It looked like Luffy didn’t even remember when he got out of bed and thought he’d lost his hat. Chopper couldn’t take it anymore and had to leave the room, just for a moment. He walked out onto the deck and sat against the infirmary door and sobbed.

 

Out of everybody, Robin heard his cries first and walked out onto the deck and saw Chopper sobbing against the door. She immediately thought Luffy had gone. 

“Chopper, what happened?” she asked, and held him to herself. Chopper couldn’t answer for a few moments, crying and letting all his stress and despair out.

Finally, he could speak again. “He - he can’t move or feel his body. Then - then he said he didn’t want to die! He was coherent and serious and then all of the sudden he thought Ace was back! It’s like he had dementia! He’s not getting better… Robin, this isn’t good! He’s just getting worse and hallucinating more.” Chopper tok a few deep breaths and said, “I have injectable sedatives in case things get bad. But I don’t want to put him back to sleep yet. I’m gonna let him have time with what he thinks is Ace.”

“Chopper, is it time to tell Luffy? So he can say goodbye to the others?” Robin asked gently, but frowned when Chopper shook his head vehemently. She sighed. “Then If he’s truly not going to make it, don’t you think we should make the rest of his time nice? Brook and Franky haven’t seen him yet,” she said softly and kindly. Chopper couldn’t bear to go back in, so Robin set him down and opened the door, walking over to Luffy, who was laughing and joking with “Ace”. 

“Robin, is that you?” Luffy asked, his haki still working a bit. She said yes and gently turned his head to the side so he could see her and was facing the door. 

“Hey, you haven’t met Ace yet,” he said happily, his eyes a bit out of focus and looking to the left of Robin. “Ace, this is Robin. We met her at Alabasta after you left. She was a bad guy but now she’s my friend and she’s really smart.” Then he paused as if listening for an answer. “Yeah, I knew you’d think so too.” 

Robin pursed her lips, trying not to cry as Luffy continued to compliment her as he talked to his imaginary dead brother. She approached the subject as best as she was able while he was like this, and asked the empty air, with her voice tight, “Ace, would you like to meet the crew members you haven’t met yet?” 

“Yeah, Ace you should meet Franky and Brook!” but raising his voice caused him to cough violently. He started to seize as he laughed. He was losing his mind. It was obvious and painfully heartbreaking for Robin. And it was happening so fast.

“I’ll go get them, Luffy,” she said after his seizures stopped. She walked out and closed the door behind her as Luffy laughed happily.

She and Chopper walked to the galley and they all saw Chopper’s wet fur and Robin biting her lip. They were all filled with dread. 

“Franky and Brook, Luffy wants you to meet Ace. Just - just play along. And don’t react if he starts to seize. It’s quite obvious that he’s losing his mind.” She didn’t want to tell them about him being paralyzed, but Chopper felt he needed to.

“Luffy has lost all feeling and control of his whole body… he’s become paralyzed.” Everyone in the room looked like they were filled with despair. Even Zoro pulled at his hair in hopelessness. It was his fault. If he had kept better watch of the idiot captain, he would be fine now! Even Sanji saw it, that he was to blame.

Nami, Usopp and Franky were visibly crying while Brook had no expression on his skull. Sanji bit into his cigarette and clenched his hands on the counter. Did Luffy still not know who he was? 

Brook got up and walked out the door, followed by Robin and Chopper, and after a few moments, Franky as well. They walked to the door and inside as Luffy was laughing while violently seizing. His head was still turned towards the door. “Oh hey, Ace, this is Brook and Franky. Franky’s a cyborg and Brook’s a skeleton. Interesting right?” his body collapsed down and turned limp after his body calmed. His arm flopped off the side of the bed, but he didn’t notice. 

Franky tried his best to smile, but it was pained. Luffy didn’t notice thankfully.

“It’s very nice to finally meet you Ace-san. Luffy-san has spoken highly of you,” Brook said kindly, looking to where Luffy was looking. He laughed between coughing fits and began to tell “Ace” about Franky’s inventions before he fell silent and looked extremely confused and horrified. 

“What happened?” he asked seriously. He seemed to have come back from his hallucinations. His face fell as he seemed to realize what was happening to him. “Am I crazy?” he asked himself. The others couldn’t bring themselves to tell him he was. He took their silence as a confirmation and took a deep, shuddering breath through the oxygen mask. “Can you get the rest of the crew? While I’m still... sane,” he quickly and desperately said, thoroughly panicking now. He knew he was going crazy now. He could all but feel himself fading out. Ace wasn’t really here. Sabo wasn’t either. 

Robin nodded and quickly ran to the galley, shouting for everyone to come now. Nami, Usopp and even Sanji and Zoro sprinted out and into the infirmary. 

“Hi guys,” Luffy said sadly. “Before I go again, I want to thank you. It’s been fun. I’ll beat this,” he said halfheartedly, more like he was trying to convince himself but was failing to do so. There was pure terror on his face. “I just had to go an eat a poisonous mushroom,” he said with a forced and feeble laugh. 

“I wanted to become the pirate king so much… thanks for helping me. And Sanji -” he began to say, but his eyes unexpectedly unfocused and he started laughing that Ace thought they were all pretty funny. The seizures were becoming a constant thing as he shook, still laughing maniacally before he spit up a bit of blood. Chopper screamed for all of them to get out as he ran to Luffy’s side. To say the crew was destroyed was an understatement. 

They stumbled out of the door and began to cry. Even Sanji and Zoro had some tears. The more emotional ones were sobbing. Sanji seemed to be the worse off, though he tried to hide it. Luffy had remembered him and was going to say something and then he was gone. He truly was losing his mind. 

Robin had her eyes closed at she bloomed an eye and ear on the infirmary wall. She watched as Chopper begged Luffy to stop laughing so he could help him, but Luffy wouldn’t stop. Finally, tearfully, he injected the sedative into Luffy’s inner elbow. Luffy’s eyelids drooped and he fell asleep. Chopper saw what had happened to Luffy, gasped and then cried. Robin made the eye and ear disappear as she sat against the wall of the Sunny.

Chopper saw what had caused the blood. Luffy’s blood vessels all popped. There was red bruising under the skin at almost every artery. He looked like he had a terrible rash across his body. Even his face had gotten the red bruising. He gasped when he opened Luffy’s robe. His chest was bright red. Chopper regretted putting Luffy to sleep. He could die any moment and he didn’t even get to say goodbye to anyone, or say any final words. He had put around an hours’ worth in that syringe. If he could last another hour, he could say his final words. Chopper didn’t know how long it would take for him to die from the broken vessels. 

There was no mistake to the others. Luffy was going to die, and based on the sobbing they heard through the door, they knew whatever had happened was bad.

Chopper wiped his eyes with his arm and closed Luffy’s robe and then pulled a blanket over Luffy’s body. He didn’t want to see those red bruises. It was bad enough to see them on his face, but he couldn't stand seeing it everywhere else. He ran his hoof through Luffy’s oily hair. He hadn’t had a shower or bath in days. Luffy looked so peaceful when he was asleep. He was glad Luffy felt no real pain through all of this. Chopper thanked his rubber body for being different, and even thanked the fact Luffy’s body had gone numb. 

Chopper left the room, needing comfort from his crew, his family. This was the worst thing that had ever happened to him. It was hard when his father died, but he had died fighting for a cause he believed in. Here, the strong, 19 year old, 400 million beri bounty pirate captain was quickly becoming insane and dying because he ate something he wasn’t supposed to. And Chopper could do nothing to stop it. No one could stop it. 

He walked out, looking for Robin, and saw her up against the wall with her knees bent and her head hidden in his arms. He walked to her and hugged her, his own tears dripping onto her blouse.


	3. Part 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sadness ahead. Beware.

**Last chapter. May be sad for some people, so prepare yourself. I had a lot of fun writing this because I'm sort of a sadist when writing. I mean, a lot of my One Piece fanfics have a main character die. May be brought back to life but you'll just have to read it if you want to know the details LOL. Enjoy~**

Zoro made to get up and go inside, but Chopper warned him. "I don't think you want to see him like this Zoro," he sniffled. Zoro paused at his words for a few seconds, but marched in anyway. Sanji followed suit. Brook left to get his violin and then entered the room as well. The others stayed out of the room, waiting for their captain to wake up and too terrified to see what had happened while he was sleeping.

Zoro's mouth gaped as he saw Luffy. His face was bruised red, and when he pulled the blanket down and opened the robe, the rest of his body was like that as well. Sanji gasped and then clenched his teeth. He said nothing as Zoro grabbed Luffy's limp and numb hand and apologized. From the bottom of his heart he apologized for letting this happen. He started breathing heavily and his heavy breaths turned into gasps then turning into hyperventilation. It was very out of character. Both Sanji and Brook put their hands on Zoro's shoulder. He said nothing, and they only had their hands on his shoulder for a moment, but it caused Zoro to calm himself.

Brook began to play Bink's Sake, Luffy's favorite song, slowly and softly. The three pirates watched their captain sleep peacefully, waiting for him to wake up, maybe for the last time. It was over an hour of Brook playing Bink's Sake repeatedly before Luffy woke up. The other's in the Monster Trio didn't complain about the music. They both had their heads in their hands as they sat on the floor.

"I can't die like this," they heard a hoarse whisper. "Such a stupid way to go. I'd rather have been defeated by stupid Arlong. Not a damn mushroom," Luffy said breathlessly, like breathing was becoming difficult. He got his breathing under control and continued to speak. "Brook… I'm sorry you have to see me like this," Luffy said sadly. More forcefully, he said, " _I can't die here._ "

Both Sanji and Zoro stood up quickly and grabbed onto his arm, though he couldn't feel it. Brook continued to play as he told Luffy he had had a fun second life with him, even if it was relatively short.

Luffy smiled at that and then said, "Zoro, it's not your fault. I'll get better. Tell Chopper not to sedate me anymore. Please." He started to feel himself begin to fade. "GET OUT. I don't want you seeing me like this. Tell Chopper I'm thankful and it's not his fault," he said hurriedly, before shouting once again for them to get out. They followed their captain's order and left, closing the door as he started to talk to Ace again.

" _Ace, I don't want to die,"_  he thought, though he said something else.

" _I know. Ignore what you think is me. Focus on getting better. I don't want to see you yet. You have to grow older and become the pirate king,_ " what he thought was the real Ace said in his mind. " _I didn't save you so you could die like this._ " He could feel Ace's hand grip his as he cried through the maniacal laughter and shaking.

Through his laughter, he began to chant "I can do this" over and over again and, for a moment, wondered if he just needed meat. He had heard Chopper say his odds were half of a percent and said he'd die. But he'd survived worse. He'd survived Impel Down and Marineford. He'd survived everything that had happened to him as a kid. He'd survived Crocodile, Arlong, Lucci, Eneru, Moria, Aokiji, Ceasar, Akainu, Hordy and more. He'd survived Ace and Sabo's deaths. He could do this. He had survived those twenty hours of pain by eating and moving nutrients around his body. So why can't he control his body now?

It was half an hour later that Chopper came back in, watching as Luffy scrunched his eyes and breathed heavily. It finally looked like Luffy was feeling the pain. Was that good or bad? His body seized but still he had that pained and determined look on his face. Chopper stayed silent as he watched Luffy desperately fight death. Luffy began to scream like a battle cry, not a scream of pain. Luffy imagined himself moving his finger. Just his finger. He could do this! He felt his finger twitch, but didn't stop his battle cry. It was another two hours of Luffy's voice crying out that he could move his whole finger. He panted, smiling and laughing. It wasn't a maniacal laugh, it was a true laugh as he seized. He was making progress! To Chopper, he must have looked crazy again. But Chopper had been told not to sedate him, so he didn't. Luffy wanted Chopper to leave. It was hard to focus when he heard Chopper sniffling.

"Chop - per," he laughed, back to his maniacal laughter. "Leave," he commanded weakly in between individual laughs. "I'll be fine. Don- don't worry. Next... time… you come in, I'll be better." Chopper cried loudly as he was told to leave and hearing the heartbreaking false hope Luffy had felt like a stab in his heart.

Luffy couldn't worry about hurting Chopper's feelings at the moment. He had to focus on himself. Only himself. He'd make it up to Chopper later.

Chopper went running out and jumped into Robin's lap. "He told me to go away!" he sobbed.

"He said next time I come in, he'll be better." Sanji, Brook and Zoro looked at each other. Luffy was fighting. It was the most serious battle he'd ever fought as far as they knew. Usopp, Franky and Nami said things like "Luffy can beat this" or "Trust him, he'll be fine". The other five knew it was almost over. Their captain hadn't wanted anyone to see him as he was now. He wanted them to remember him as lively and fun, with a grin on his face almost everywhere he went.

Luffy was starving by the time he could use two fingers. This was exhausting, and he was fighting sleep. He couldn't sleep, he had to keep fighting. Every time he took a deep breath, he could feel the insanity approaching. It was also exhausting to try and stay sane. Stay who he was. Finally, over an hour after that, he could use his left hand. But suddenly his hand started to tingle again.

"No, no, no… No, not yet. I'm making progress… no, don't sleep. I can't sleep. No!" he shouted as he began to seize again. He had gotten so far! He widened his eyes as he watched Ace appear once again. "Ace, go away you're not really here!" he felt true panic set in as he began to laugh.

"I'm sorry little brother."

Luffy began to cry as he lost control of his hand again. His chest was for some reason hurting from the laughter and his vision was going dark.

"Ace help me! I can't die!" he cried between the painful noises he wished would stop. He knew that Zoro and Sanji could tell what was happening to him with their observation haki, but loyal as they were, they stayed out and willed him to win this fight. But he was losing terribly. After all that boasting about getting better, he lost anyway. Empty boasts. Isn't that what he'd always been?

"I can't help little brother. Relax."

Luffy could hear the heart monitor screeching loudly with his cries until he lost all vision and became blind and deaf. He could feel the warmth of his brother's hand still. Then there was a smaller hand as well.  _Sabo…_ The warmth was getting hotter and felt realer as everything else faded.

"Though I didn't want to see you this soon, I missed you," Sabo's young voice said kindly in his mind. The sounds of his brothers grew louder. Their breathing became louder as he felt his mind slow. He finally gave in and felt his body relax and he felt lighter and better than he had in awhile. His body felt healthy again and he was with his two brothers. None of the three had fulfilled their dreams except Ace, who had lived with no regrets.

And so Monkey D Luffy lost his final battle, alone in the infirmary while his crew believed he was fighting to get better.

Zoro and Sanji knew what had happened and both started to shake in despair. Robin noticed their demeanors and put her face in her hands and began to truly cry. Chopper noticed her reaction and ran out of the door and to the infirmary. The rest of the crew heard him screaming in despair and stumbled out the door after them. Zoro, Sanji and Robin were last to go.

The crew saw Luffy wearing a small smile with still wet tears on his cheeks as his eyes were open and glazed. Robin walked in and closed his big brown eyes. He looked truly terrible, with red blotches and the visible veins stretched across his pale skin.

They all broke out into tears. And Sanji cursed the idiot for dying in such a stupid way. It was embarrassing for him to die like this. Zoro clenched his hands and teeth in anger. No matter what Luffy had said, it was still his fault. He'd have to live with this burden the rest of his life.

Luffy watched from the corner as his second family cried. How he wished he could apologize. But he couldn't and painfully looked away from the scene. He followed his brothers, wherever they were leading him, leaving the sounds of his crying friends behind him.

**Please review!**


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